Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Gallery of Hair "Don't"s

What with getting married in, oh, 17 days or so now (insert appropriate freakout about the number of things that have to be done and the short period of time that we actually have to GET them done) so I figured it would be a good idea to figure out how I want my hair to look. I have uber fine hair, but lots of it so wearing it down really isn't an option. It'd become a kinky, frizzy mess in no time.

So, I turned to the trusty internets to suggest ways I could wear my hair. Below are some of the suggestions I came across but have declined to don myself.

This is one I like to call "miss-muffet and her mini bananas." While it may look nice when eating curds and whey, and bananas are healthy and nutritious are not suitable hair pieces. I'm also not a fan of the exploded baby's breath, but that's the least of my worries on this one.

This is one I like to call the "sci-fi alien princess-meets-beekeper" do.

I think that it even comes with the stunted "you humans do amuse me so" look if you pull the hair tight enough.

Um pass.

I can't decide about this one; is it the "I always wanted to look like Spike from Degrassi" do or the "I wanted to pay tribute to my career as an electrician" hair. Either way, I remember my love of the crimping iron in hindsight as a fashion don't and have no plans to resurrect mine.

Again with the explosions of baby's breath! This one truly is a
testament to the gravity-defying power of hairspray. Not only do those bangs have wicked height but all of her hair actively defies gravity as well with the shellacked to the centre (where most crazy people would put a part) and straight up. Sir Isaac Newton would be baffled, as am I.

Finally we have the "I'm marrying a greaser so I have to look the part" do with the large height bangs in front, and the slicked up back. It reminds me of those dinosaurs with big plates on their heads like the triceratops or corytosaurus

It would be a good way for me to look taller than Dave in the wedding photos, though.

The search continues!


snackiepoo said...

Wow those are awful - I am all about the simple updos like my sister had at her wedding....here are some pics:


Heather said...

snackiepoo: your sister looked great, and I've got a gallery of nicer options to show my hairstylist - I just couldn't resist posting the hideous ones. Thanks for stopping by!

mamatulip said...

You would ROCK the sci-fi alien 'do.

Seventeen days? Woo hoo!

Mrs. Chicky said...

Wow, I had forgotten about Spike from Degrassi. I loved her. I think you should go for that do, totally. You'd be rockin' your wedding old school.

elaine said...

I think I'll go for the reverse tsunami one for your wedding (2nd from the end) and the triceratops look for my own. Thanks for the ideas

TB said...

Step away from the fancy updos and the overuse of curling irons and Aquanet! Go for something a bit more natural, but it really all depends on what type of veil/headpiece you're wearing...
Also, seventeen days!!! You must be getting so excited.

roro said...

Oh my god! 17 days!! As for the hair, I say Spike from Degrassi all the way. That girl had it goin' ON, Heather. You know it and I know it.

Hope you don't go too nuts in the next couple of weeks! Best keep some boozy bears handy.

sunshine scribe said...

oh those are funny but you could pull of the spike lookin the 'shwa - no? So, just kidding :)

17 Days!!!! Woo hoo. Can't wait to see the real photos

Kristin said...

I personally am rooting for the "You humans amuse me so".

wordgirl said...

Oh God...I feel your pain. Go with something that fits your personality...but just a tad...you know....dressier. How long has your hairdresser known you? He/she should be able to lead you to something that works for you.

J said...

Yes, I'm also opposed to baby's breath for all of its intended purposes. Blech.

Heather said...

mamatulip: Alien do, eh?

Mrs. Chicky: How can you forget spike! Man I loved that show!

elaine: Oooh good one.

TB: the thing is my hair is so fine (like unnaturally so) that I really can't wear it down. It'd be destroyed in a matter of minutes (seriously). The less hair there is for me to fidget with, the better. I've got a simple updo with curls pinned to my head which I think looks great with the veil.

roro: the spike look seems to be the most popular. I still remember reading the book about her character at a boy-girl party in grade 4 and reading the part about s-e-x. Boozey bears are the only thing preventing a descent into madness as I type this.

Sunshine Scribe: I'm giving my camera to a girlfriend of one of the groomsmen so I'll have pictures to share.

Kristin: I'll register your vote accordingly.

wordgirl: I'm lucky to have a fantastic hairstylist who is a complete perfectionist and who knows my hair and I know will do a great job. I've been going to the same place for a haircut since I was 4. (plus? $35 for an updo? Awesome!)

J: I too am opposed to all (floral) forms of baby's breath.

kittenpie said...

Oh come on now, you live in the 'shwa, you haven't seen the Wall Of Bangs on a few people there? I know it's not technically the 80s anymore, but if you can still listen to the music and wear your baseball band jersey...

*ducking* JOKE! A JOKE!This was totally funny.

Heather said...

Kittenpie: actually, as you get off the 401 here you enter into some time-space continuum warp wherein the hair fashion never changes from 1986 BUT everything else seems perfectly normal (if a bit backward, redneck, lower class but with more money). do-dee-do do (that'd be the twilight zone theme)