Calling all geneticists!

I'm sweeping our hardwood floors (an advantage to owning an older house though they're not in perfect shape) and have decided that we need another animal in this house.

But not just any animal - I want one that eats the hair that falls off the other animals in our house. Now, like most people, I have a pretty strong aversion to tampering with nature, and we already have a house full of animals, but if they could make an animal that eats hairs from the other animals I'd actually look past the tampering and overcrowding and be the first in line to get one.

Heck, we could probably feed an entire pack of animals that subsist on hair.

Now there are some criteria here - it'd have to be quiet, and get along with the other animals, and hopefully not take up much space because our house is pretty overrun as it is with animals. Also, if it could not look like a rat or have a rat-like tail Dave would be much happier; he's really not into rats.

So, if there are any budding geneticists who could create something like this we'd be really grateful.

In the meantime I am pushing for us to register for a Roomba, which, while expensive, looks like it'd be perfect for our house. Assuming we keep the rest of our crap off the floors so it could do its job.